Well hello there.
Welcome to Sluggy's CHILLI PEPPER PAGE !
The first, and definitive punk rock chilli pepper growing page on this island Earth !
I'M TALKING ABOUT THE CAPSICUM PEPPER, MASTER OF THE VEGETABLE GROUP !!!
Actually, did you know that peppers are technically speaking FRUITS and not vegetables ?
I bet you didn't, you lying sonofabitch. But really, it's true, yo.
You can learn this, and lots of other things here ! For instance : how to grow and pickle peppers, which hot sauces to buy and which weaksauces to avoid. Who were the Arawaks ? What the hell is a Scoville unit ? How do I combat garden pests, how do I make my own pepper spray ? What is capsaicin and how do I extract it ?
After all, besides "Who Farted?", that's the question we all want to know the answer to.
On this page you will find all the information that other chilli pages have and more, but with twice the ATTITUDE.
And that means that you should probably be aware this site features copious amounts of unneccessary profanity and if you're easily offended by that sort of thing this would probably be a good time for you to get out of here and go join a convent or something.
Growing chilli peppers can be a fun, rewarding pastime for aging punk rockers with a less than busy or less than exciting social agenda.
All it takes is some seeds, some garden soil, some water, a little garden, balcony or window with a bit of sunlight, and time. It is 100 % legal and you don't need a "green thumb" to do it (my middle fingers are brown most of the time).
You also don't need a lot of money to grow. Even on a starving artist's budget you can do it. Hell, it costs less than you can rob from the DOMINO'S PIZZA DELIVERY GUY and you can just scrounge the seams of your beat up couch for change and get started.
Don't have any friends, go DIY and grow your own. Chillies are more fun than digital pets. These fiery friends won't steal your beer or scratch your records.
No matter whether you're chomping on a greasy german bratwurst, soggy Tortilla de Patatas in Spain, or Dutch flea-infested squat house "punk rock rice" with 4 inches of crispy charcoal at the bottom of the pan and a mouldy turnip on the side, trust me, friends : Sluggy is no chef, but Sluggy knows when there's something missing. Something important, like SPICE. That's we always like to get our 'rhoids flaring with a bottle of ultra hot sauce which we bring along on the road and fondly refer to as : THE WHACKER.
THE WHACKER makes everything taste good !
And I do mean everything ! It's INSTANT GOOD EATIN'. I put it on everything I eat... Rice, Noodles, Cereal, Spuds, Pizza, Birthday Cake, Pussy... it's all good.
Hell, I'd eat a fucking plate of SAND if there was hot sauce poured all over it.
I scarcely laughed harder than that time I got my freak on with my at the time special lady friend, and felt her up "down there" several hours after cutting some tasty Thai peppers.
In the (ahem) heat of passion, she was practically rocketjumping around the bedroom. LOL !
I damn near busted a kidney laughing.
I laughed so hard I farted blood and stained the sheets. Then it made my left nut twitch for half a month.
OK, maybe you should have been there to think it was funny, but I'll assure you, it was priceless. Even funnier than the time I pushed her momma down the stairs.
That fucking bitch.
Want even more LOLZ0RZ ? Go to the video section of this page to see some dummies get fucked up hardcore eating super hot peppers !
I'M TALKING ABOUT THE CAPSICUM PEPPER, MASTER OF THE VEGETABLE GROUP !!!
I bet you didn't, you lying sonofabitch. But really, it's true, yo.
You can learn this, and lots of other things here ! For instance : how to grow and pickle peppers, which hot sauces to buy and which weaksauces to avoid. Who were the Arawaks ? What the hell is a Scoville unit ? How do I combat garden pests, how do I make my own pepper spray ? What is capsaicin and how do I extract it ?
After all, besides "Who Farted?", that's the question we all want to know the answer to.
On this page you will find all the information that other chilli pages have and more, but with twice the ATTITUDE.
And that means that you should probably be aware this site features copious amounts of unneccessary profanity and if you're easily offended by that sort of thing this would probably be a good time for you to get out of here and go join a convent or something.
Why Punk Rock Chilli Growing ?
Hell, it beats gluing glitter & macaroni to a plate.Growing chilli peppers can be a fun, rewarding pastime for aging punk rockers with a less than busy or less than exciting social agenda.
All it takes is some seeds, some garden soil, some water, a little garden, balcony or window with a bit of sunlight, and time. It is 100 % legal and you don't need a "green thumb" to do it (my middle fingers are brown most of the time).
You also don't need a lot of money to grow. Even on a starving artist's budget you can do it. Hell, it costs less than you can rob from the DOMINO'S PIZZA DELIVERY GUY and you can just scrounge the seams of your beat up couch for change and get started.
Don't have any friends, go DIY and grow your own. Chillies are more fun than digital pets. These fiery friends won't steal your beer or scratch your records.
How did this madness start ?
See, while on tour with the band, the food often ain't too good.No matter whether you're chomping on a greasy german bratwurst, soggy Tortilla de Patatas in Spain, or Dutch flea-infested squat house "punk rock rice" with 4 inches of crispy charcoal at the bottom of the pan and a mouldy turnip on the side, trust me, friends : Sluggy is no chef, but Sluggy knows when there's something missing. Something important, like SPICE. That's we always like to get our 'rhoids flaring with a bottle of ultra hot sauce which we bring along on the road and fondly refer to as : THE WHACKER.
THE WHACKER makes everything taste good !
And I do mean everything ! It's INSTANT GOOD EATIN'. I put it on everything I eat... Rice, Noodles, Cereal, Spuds, Pizza, Birthday Cake, Pussy... it's all good.
Hell, I'd eat a fucking plate of SAND if there was hot sauce poured all over it.
Chillies are FUN
Especially when tag teamed with sure-fire hits like ALCOHOL and PUSSY, just check the aphrodesiac section of this page !I scarcely laughed harder than that time I got my freak on with my at the time special lady friend, and felt her up "down there" several hours after cutting some tasty Thai peppers.
In the (ahem) heat of passion, she was practically rocketjumping around the bedroom. LOL !
I damn near busted a kidney laughing.
I laughed so hard I farted blood and stained the sheets. Then it made my left nut twitch for half a month.
OK, maybe you should have been there to think it was funny, but I'll assure you, it was priceless. Even funnier than the time I pushed her momma down the stairs.
That fucking bitch.
